Well...to be honest...I don't feel like a supermom. I feel like a mom who will do anything for her child with special needs and nothing more. Yes I am involved in a lot of different special needs organizations and programs but I do them because it benefits my daughter. If programs didn't exist I found a way for them to exist. Temple Grandin said "find what they love and foster it" and that is exactly what I do. My daughter loves to sing, dance and perform. So I had to find ways for her to be able to do that. She is not going to be a scholar, I know that and I needed to find a way to make her happy doing what she loves most in the world.
What would my daughter be doing if she didn't have all of the programs that I have her involved in? Well...I don't know. She refuses to do homework and I have given up after 4 years of fighting and tears (by me) every night in an attempt to get her to do it. She can't read very well so to get her to sit and read on her own is nearly impossible. There aren't many kids in my neighborhood who I feel comfortable letting her play with ....so...I guess...if we didn't go to all of these programs.....she would be sitting watching TV becoming a couch potato driving me crazy. At least running her all over gods creation gets her socializing and interacting. It gives her the opportunity to do what she loves most in the whole world....perform (through her special needs cheer team and her special needs theatre group). I would go to (and have gone) the ends of the earth for her if I know that it is something that she would love to do. Most importantly, our relationship is so much better then it was in the past. We used to fight all the time. She would cry, I would cry it would be BAD. Now, we practice her theatre songs in the car together or we put on her favorite musical (which at this time is Peter Pan...thank you NBC) and sing the score from that. We both love our time together.
I get a lot of backlash from people who just don't "get it". The ones that say that I let her get away with too much and I don't let her try to amuse herself..blah blah blah. Live my life for a day and let me know how that goes for you. It is not easy dealing with a child who has a disability. It is downright exhausting but you know what....when she is at these programs...I get to socialize too...I get to interact with other adults who are going through exactly the same issues....I get to enjoy myself as much as she is enjoying herself. It is a win/win.! Maybe it is me being selfish...maybe I don't want to have to play with her 24/7. Maybe I need a break too. Maybe hearing from other parents that I am not crazy in the way I feel is so reassuring that I am "normal" in this world. The world that I didn't choose, but, the one I couldn't imagine living any differently.
So...do I feel like a supermom? No, I feel like a mom who is trying to survive in the best possible way, given the cards I have been dealt. And you know what? I think I am doing a pretty good job!
Until next time...
Jenn
No comments:
Post a Comment